In the Eye of the Storm

After some time, when you look back, you realize God had carried you through the darkest and deepest valley.

Have there been times when you were in the eye of a fierce storm but still felt like you were being safely protected? Were there times when you did not have the strength to even take one more step and could not see the way forward? After some time, when you look back, you realize God had carried you through the darkest and deepest valley.

In 2020, my husband and I were navigating his heart health issues in addition to challenges that the pandemic presented. We had gone through health challenges in the past, but 2020 made this experience very different due to COVID-19 restrictions.

As a care giver, I could not be by the bedside of my husband when he was hospitalized. I had to rely on communications with the hospital care team and technology to understand the conditions of my husband. There were times I felt so worried and helpless as I was not in control of the situation.

When I was in fear, I called out to God for help. I prayed, listened to worship music, and cried. God answered me that He would be there always and forever. He did not promise a smooth and easy life, but He promised His presence always. Many worship songs gave me encouragement and support during the most difficult time. However, there was one that really summed up my feelings and touched my heart deeply. It was a Mandarin worship song sung by a world renowned Chinese Praise Music Ministry, Stream of Praise. The title is translated as “Let Me Stay”.

“Let me stay. I want to stay right here in Your embrace. Let me stay. Give me the strength to love You more each day. There is no other place I would rather be than here, Lord. With all my heart, with all I am, I worship [You].

In a time of suffering, it was very hard to love and praise God without doubt, questioning and bitterness. However, I determined to sing praise to my Lord despite how difficult it could get, so long as I still have one breath.

I know life won’t be any easier, but with God’s presence, His grace is always sufficient and I will forever dwell in His house.

“One thing have I asked of the Lord, that will I seek after: that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the Lord and to inquire in his temple.” Psalm 27:4

Margaret Tam is the Executive Director of Human Resources. She was born in Hong Kong and immigrated to Vancouver with her family when she was in high school. She currently resides in Burnaby, BC.