Monica,

Thanks for the feedback on my post. I would have to say that I can also be quite empathetic. While I do not often come across that way as I can be rather brash, internally I definitely am highly empathetic. Though, I do think that this may have lessened due to certain situations I have been in myself.

In your post you said, “I have found in some Christian ministries this question of removing members from a team ends up being very “touchy” subject and policies on it are vague” (MONICAGRACE, 2018, para. 3). In my own setting it is quite a touchy subject. Much like you we are volunteers in that we have to raise our own financial support. I am not sure how it works in your context, but in mine we are technically all self-employed and “contracted” by our organization. This makes many leaders my organization hold the opinion that we cannot fire people. I must agree with you that this also bothers me and that we could probably be more effective in ministry if we were more willing to “let people go”. I think there is time and place for discipleship/mentorship, and for growth, in any context, however, I think there should also be some standards.

I appreciate the approach you articulated to having these hard conversations with people. I especially appreciate your articulation of explaining “that your empathy superseded “the hat” you are responsible to wear in ministry” (MONICAGRACE, 2018, para. 4). I think the biggest challenge for me in those situations is maintaining the proper hat. In ministry relationships can be very grey in the sense that you often do form deep friendships with the people you are leading, which can cause these conversations to be quite awkward and emotional.

As I was reading your response it became clear to me that perhaps a preventative step I could take would be to more clearly articulate our vision and goals as a team. This would then help me have these conversations if the need arises because the expectations will have been clearly articulated from the beginning.

Thanks for the feedback!

– B

References:

MONICAGRACE. (2018, October 29). Response to B’s Learning Activity 2 [Blog post]. Retrieved from https://create.twu.ca/monicagrace/2018/10/29/response-to-bs-learning-activity-2/