Sarah, wow, thank you so much for your refreshing and challenging post about Confucius’ statement,

“What you do not wish done to yourself, do not do to others.”

Your application of this statement to leadership was brilliant; that being a leader means proactively and respectfully giving constructive feedback, even when it is difficult. Currently, I have several situations where I need to submit constructive and respectful feedback, and as a leader I have a history of avoiding this. Though I am growing in this area, I still struggle to be confrontational and if given the option, I avoid giving constructive feedback.  I also experience a lot of anxiety before giving feedback, especially if I know the individual is more “sensitive” or there have been complaints they are unaware of.

Sarah, two statements that really struck me from your blog were:

1) “If I was in this person’s shoes, how would I want the situation to be handled?”

2) “It may seem like you are doing someone a favour by hiding the truth about their subpar performance, or complaints received, but the truth is, you are doing that person a disservice. You are denying them an opportunity to grow, and reinforcing a false idealization about their performance.”

These two statements were challenging and very applicable to my situation. Thank you for “respectfully confronting” me as a leader with your wisdom and your example of how you tell the truth to individuals in your organization.

Personally, I like to be an “encouraging” and “empowering” leader that helps people towards growth, but I recognize though encouragement is vital, constructive and honest feedback is just as important! You can encourage someone towards a “false idealization” about their performance and leave them stunted in their growth.

Though I find it difficult, I will look forward to these impending feedback times, as being honest is the most caring thing to do. I will trust God to lead me to speak with both “truth and love” (Ephesians 4:15) and approach the situation with humility, knowing I am far from perfect.

My question is: When it comes to complaints or issues with a team member, at what point do you recognize and suggest that their current work situation is not best for an individual? 

 

References

Watson, L.E. (1951). Light from Many Lamps. New York: Simon and Schuster.